Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Mommy musings

Sad but true: This blog is the most technological thing that I do.
It's something of a miracle that I can link and post photos since I'm beyond inept when it comes to computers. Or, anything electrical, for that matter. I needed so much rescuing at work that one of our computer gurus told me that if he wrote a book, an entire chapter would be dedicated to my screwups alone.
If someone sends me an attachment, I usually can't open it. I can't download. I don't even know where the "on" switch is.
I can barely use my cell phone, let alone text.
A few weeks ago my 4-year-old begged me to play Wii with him. After about 5 minutes, I realized that despite all my gyrations and button pushing, I wasn't even playing.
"You stink, Mama!" he yelled.
So, all this is backstory for my sad tale:
I'm home alone on a Saturday night. All the kids were spoken for at assorted sleepovers and campouts. My husband had a poker game.
Since my right foot is broken and not drive-worthy, I was stuck at home. With four TV remotes. All I wanted was to catch up with "What Not to Wear." Couldn't even turn the damn thing on.
I called my husband on his cell, "Don't give me any s***," I warned, "I can't get the TV to work."
He tried to walk me through it. I gave up.
On the other end of the technological spectrum, my 7-year-old — just days ago — managed to get onto the Mac (which she's not allowed to use), make her way to itunes, buy $25 worth of Hannah Montana music and download everything onto her brand-new ipod. I can't even do that.
I can shop online, though.*
Addendum: As further testament to everything I just said, look at this wonky post. I can't even figure out how to not have a skinny column of copy. Sigh.
*Explanation of photo: One of the coolest things about parenthood — second only to finally being able to say, "Because I said so!" — is that you can torment your kids by dressing them up in silly outfits. This is my trio as three French hens. It was for a recent Christmas card.

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